my pride between her teeth, those blurred eyes said so much. dead weight in a sickened stomach. cheap vodka, three empty glasses, oh no i shouldn't. why did you just stand there. why did you just stand there. hands turned upward, oh how dare you. splitting hairs and breaking down walls.

her drink-loose lips curled into a sneer. curled into exactly what i hate the most.

fuck this girl, i need another drink.

across the parking lot, screams and obscenities staining the night. the click-click-click of sprinklers. the crunch-crunch-crunch across gravel. half-slipping on the wet grass. falling face first into hell.

go be with your new girlfriend. stupid bitch.

oh girl. i thought i told you. don't. ever. start shit. that you can't. finish.

her hands around my throat. and all i can remember. is hoping that i don't dent the hood of my car. with my. fucking. head.

more beer in the park while waiting. waiting. throat on fire. pulse throbbing behind tired eyes. listening to the click-click-click of the sprinklers. and the crunch-crunch-crunch of gravel. late at night. in the otherwise calm air. but our electricity has burned something darker into the night. it smells like copper wiring. it smells like seared tin foil. it smells like stale alcohol coming from a shit-talking mouth.

and that's why. i prefer to drink by myself. because when i drink with her. someone always winds up alone. getting sprayed by automatic sprinklers. and chain smoking in the dark.